Langston Hughes

Today like yesterday,
Tomorrow like today;

The drip, drip, drip of monotony,
is wearing my life away.

Today like yesterday,
Tomorrow like today.

I feel below worthless.

Big Day for U.S Soccer (We Hope)

At 2:30 Manchester United will take on Villareal in the first day of Champions League Group play. Villareal has American Jozy Altidore, the truth, one piece in the promising future of American soccer. He's a talented goal-scorer with size, and while he doesn't start, he has looked great coming in as a reserve. It'll be interesting for Altidore if he sees the field. DeMarcus Beasley has seen Champion's League soccer and has grown from the experience tremendously.

This is a big day -- Jozy Altidore could see time on the field in Champions League soccer against the biggest superstars on the planet. It remains to be seen if he gets time, but if he does it will be a very big step for American soccer. Adu, Altidore and Beasley all having seen Champions League group play -- all Americans. That would never have been heard of a decade ago.

Kalamazoo

I am fucking broken.

This may be the worst decision I have made in my entire life.

I don't need aother temporary fix. I need to stay where I have a support system in place, which includes counseling, and get to healing. I was making so much progress, and I have set that shit on fire. I am as depressed as I have ever been, as suicidal as I have ever been, and I want to come home. Do you realize what a failure that makes me feel like?

What the hell was I thinking? I am now lonely here, I have no counseling here, my support system is two people and not enough, as hard as they try to be and want to help, I need to know at 3:15 Kristin is going to be home. I was getting better in Buffalo. That's worth everything.

I am homeless. I can't move back because I have no place to go and no income. I am ready to find a BryLin in K'Zoo and set up shop.

Raiders vs. Broncos MNF

Monday Kristin and I visited San Quentin Federal Prison. They re-named it McAffee Coliseum, and 8 days a year they let the Raiders play football there. It's well-publicized that Raiders fans are absolute maniacs, and they take pride in that fact. I went in expecting that, but holy crap...The McAffee Coliseum on a Raiders game day is the scariest place on the planet that is not a prison.

It's going to be mostly pictures...Words cannot describe how unbelievable it was. Especially considering I dressed neutrally but rooted, quietly, for the Broncos. The pics are super out of order because blogger and I don't get along with photo alignment.

so much anticipation...The Oakland Raiders are now on the clock...

I envisioned this being the picture they showed on the News once our bodies were found in the parking lot.

the view from the 50, pre-game. All the criminals were still in the parking lot.

Child Protective Services should have a stand in the parking lot

The Tailgate

What kind of dirtbag gets a tattoo of his favorite team's logo?

CPS, Where ARRRRREEEE YOU?

if Excellence is 41-14, they are committed

this needs to be purchased for RoPo immediately

the tailgate

this old fella with the cane had much bigger balls than I did

San Mateo Bridge -- 10 miles across the southern S.F Bay


The Tailgate

the view once it got dark

this dude is probably not a lawyer

RoPo's Dad

Home of the G State Warriors. Monta Ellis and a pile of crap

Day Tres

Today was amazing. We went to the much-hyped Bills bar in North Beach, and it was even more amazing than I had anticipated. The fact that the Bills look amazing helped to be sure, but holy crap, the staff was super friendly and great. and over 100 people were in that bar wearing Bills gear and chanting "hey eh eh eh, Let's Go Buffalo!!" It was so surreal to be in the bar, watching the Bills in HD, drinking Blue from a bottle, and then looking out the window to see "holy shit, we're in San Francisco." I hugged strangers, yelled and screamed, and it felt like it could have been any bar in Western New York.....It was AMAZING.....and we met a couple who live on Main Street near Mill in West Seneca!!

After that, there was really no way to match that 3 hours of the adrenaline of a 34-10 arse-whooping (dude, seriously, Brian Moorman will have more TD passes than Tom Brady this season). We walked around North Beach, and bounced into an Irish pub to watch the Browns/Cowboys for a little bit. 33 beers on tap, and the most beautiful HD I have ever seen...It was cool, but it was and Irish Pub/Indian Eatery.....seriously...but where else than S.F would that happen?

After that we went somewhere that I got a little reflective and a little historic. City Lights Bookstore in North Beach (and literally a 30 second walk from China Town) is where Ginsberg, Kerouac, Buchowski, and most of the beats back in the day hung out and read, thought, and just kind of bull-shitted with each other. It's still in-tact, independent and seemingly un-manipulated. Next door, across Jack Kerouac Lane, was Vesuvio, where the same clan got their debauchery on. It's still there too, and it's supremely San Franciscoan.


We were too tired, and 5 or 6 beers deep, to walk, so we took this Scenic drive that the city has set out which takes you past the Golden Gate and down along the ocean. It was REALLY foggy, but still, it's so energizing to just smell the salt-water and see and hear the waves. And with the wind, the waves were almost surf-able.

Just an average view you get when you cross the street in S.F.

Seriously, I thought Smart Cars were ridiculous.

...the fog. the bridge.

The Pacific. Too cold for swimming, but if you have a shitty day, you just take the dog for a walk on the beach alongside the rim of the Pacific. It was too foggy to see China.