Yikes

I just wanted to share this and drop and F-Bomb, saying that this is exactly FUCKING it. This drills where I am at at in recovery RIGHT NOW.

STAIND -- FADE

I try to breathe
Memories overtaking me
I try to face them but
the thought is too
Much to conceive

I only know that I can change
Everything else just stays the same
So now I step out of the darkness
That my life became 'cause

I just needed someone to talk to
You were just too busy with yourself
You were never there for me to
Express how I felt
I just stuffed it down
Now I'm older and I feel like
I could let some of this anger fade
But it seems the surface
I am scratching
Is the bed that I have made

So where were you
When all this I was going through
You never took the time to ask me
Just what you could do

I only know that I can change
Everything else just stays the same
So now I step out of the darkness
That my life became 'cause

I just needed someone to talk to
You were just too busy with yourself
You were never there for me to
Express how I felt
I just stuffed it down
Now I'm older and I feel like
I could let some of this anger fade
But it seems the surface
I am scratching
Is the bed that I have made

I'd especially like to thank (nts) any of y'all who would have come to see me if I was laid up with a physical illness but haven't shed a second of your time for me because it's mental. If you even have to ask if I mean you, then I do.

Y'all who I love and know have been there with me, heart and soul, thoughts, prayers and simple gestures like a text, phone call a visit, or whatever...I love you and appreciate you more than I can express into words -- I love you more than I love Curtis Granderson and PS3 COMBINED (a lot more...sorry Curtis and Sony).

"So if we love someone, we should train in being able to listen. By listening with calm and understanding, we can ease the suffering of another person." -- Thich Nhat Hanh