Lou Reed

I just want to listen to "Heroin" by Lou Reed all night. Y'all know me as the farthest thing from a drug user ever, but seriously, when I finish listening to that song I feel punched in the face. I will always remember one of TINNY and mine's famous Toronto roadies. On Sunday mornings 107.1 out of Toronto does "Psychedelic Sundays" and 102.1 out of T.O does "The on-going history of new music." Both shows pretty ridiculously rule, and go deep into old albums, yada yada yada.

The one morning on the way to Toronto, one of those two amazing stations played "Heroin" by Lou Reed and I was so god-damn confused by the song that I wanted to pull over and start shooting the shit. Imagine that, a Lou Reed song being direction-less and opaque right? Well hand me the God-damned needle, it's 10 AM on the QEW, let's do this shit...right?

The mere trial of me trying to understand the flow of the song, somehow smoke-out a meaning through the lyrics, and justify to my road trip queen why the station was still on made me feel like I just smoked whatever Steve-o claims to be puffing these days. (Fuck off Dr. Degnan, I know that's a run-on sentence).

My wanting to listen to the song right now made me re-visit the lyrics that still are is incoherent as I recall (lyrics). In an insane fucking way though, I relate whole-heartedly. There are these moments of complete beauty and clarity and romanticism in the words, and then it's pretty much babble and loss of self for a verse. That's where I am at, short of the spike in my vein.

Stephen Jenkins of Third Eye Blind, many of you don't know, is a big inspiration to me because lyrically he strikes my soul and in an interview I read when I was 18, he said On The Road by Jack Kerouac should be required reading of all high school graduates. Well...On The Road changed my life, so this dude was right on. Much less the fact that he is, or WAS, lyrically amazing, that suggestion changed my life once I picked up the book.

So I am looking for inspiration, and while I am, I feel as lost and as fucking in a fog as that song is. It's a creepy listen too. Youtube it, it's ridiculous.

I AM in Maryland...more specifically Woodstock, and I am still depressed...very, very much so. I have the camera, but I don't want to pollute my Aunt's computer with all my pics just to put them on here, so I'll do like a Maryland wrap-up when I get home with some great pics of the greatest kids in the world and Ralph (seriously, you don't know better kids, so don't even try to compare them).

I will get past this, but I hope other people realize they have to change for me to get better too.